Saturday, June 9, 2012

Zombies V Nun: Chapter Five



Zombies V Nun: Chapter Five

Who Needs A Horse When You've Got A Vespa?

✯✯✯✯✯


The courtyard reminded Pearl of the old joke…What’s black and white and red all over? Only the punch line wasn’t “a newspaper.” In this instance, the punch line would be “a bunch of undead nuns.”

Staggering about the courtyard like a gang of drunken undead sailors wearing nun habits covered with blood and guts, the sisters turned viciously towards the Vespas.

“Gun it, Pearl! They smell fresh blood!”

Caleb and Pearl tore madly through the courtyard, rolling over limbs and intestines and other items that Pearl didn’t want to identify.

They had almost cleared the lot when Sister Helena Beauregard Bacon stumbled into their path. Sister Helena weighed a good three hundred and fifty five pounds alive. As an undead person, with Sister Genevive’s leg wrapped around her beefy neck, she easily weighed an even four hundred. There was simply no way the Vespas would get by her. She looked pissed. And hungry.

Pearl pulled the chain-saw from her cute wicker basket, fired it up, and grabbed it left-handed. (Luckily for Pearl, she was ambidextrous). She held the saw in front of her like a Knight of the Round Table wielding a sword and mowed down Sister Helena in grand fashion.

Caleb gave an admiring whistle as they flew down the road to the vintner’s cottage.

“I never knew you had it in you, Pearl! Nice hacking!”

Pearl blushed and tucked the bloody saw into the basket. She wondered fleetingly how to clean stains off wicker.

✯✯✯✯✯

Last chapter tomorrow. Will there be a happy ending? What will happen to Pearl and Caleb? Will the blood stains come off the wicker basket? Stay tuned for Chapter Six - The Final Chapter.

Older episodes....
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four

I want a Vespa,
Penelope

6 comments:

caseywyatt.com said...

Woot! woot! Go Pearl!

Tom Stronach said...

Aw Penny, It's already tomorrow in Australia, post it for them and we can all then get a sneak peek....

Pearl, should be on our TV Screens too and I imagine as she loses her wimple that a shocking unruly but gorgeously wild head of hair escapes and is blowing in the wind as she makes her escape on the Vespa

Julia Barrett said...

OMG! I feel as if Snidely Whiplash has left Nell tied to the train tracks! Hurry up!

Penelope said...

Casey.....Pearl is becoming the bad-ass zombie-slaying nun.

Penelope said...

Tom.....HAAAAAA!!!!!! Of course, Pearl is hiding a head of gorgeous curly hair. Haaaaa! Yes, this would make a good SNL skit.

Penelope said...

Julia...tune in tomorrow for the stunning (and unexpected) conclusion......