Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Charmed The Pants Off Me (But Not The Heroine)




I have quite a bit of book news, in light of conference and requests. Here are my updates...

1. I read Sunset at Keyhole Canyon by Jesse Hayworth (formerly known as Prince I mean Jessica Andersen). This sweet novella is coming out May 7th. Jessica Andersen is known for her medical Harlequins and UF series, but she has recently reinvented herself as an author of "sassy western contemporaries." Me likey! As indicated by the title of this blog post, this is a sweet novella--no hot sweaty sex with a cowboy, although we could always imagine that if we have super good imaginations. *Penny imagines* This novella is an introduction to the full-length novels coming out later in the year, and I think it sets up the series nicely. I don't like too much angst and darkness in my novels, and this one is just perfect. A not-too-heavy conflict, a delicious hero who realizes he let the good girl get away and is now determined to win her back, a lovely western setting, and a heroine who finally gets her happy ending. This is a sweet and charming novella, and I'm really looking forward to digging into the ARC I have for Summer At Mustang Ridge, the full-length novel.

Grade: B+

2. More books on the TBR pile....

* Aire by Lena Goldfinch...love this author's voice! Such lush, beautiful prose...just started it.

* Skies of Steel by Zoe Archer...looks like an amazing steampunk novel! Woo hoo!

* Bonjour, Happiness! by Jamie Cat Callan...this is a non-fiction book about how French women have figured out the secret to happiness. This author looked so cute and adorable at conference that I just had to buy her book. I read this paragraph during book fair and got tears in my eyes...

"There is happiness, and we just need to look. Perhaps happiness is sitting there in our garden and is nestled between the green leaves and the fragrant tomatoes. Then again, perhaps we just need to open a few cupboards and take out some nice spices and melt a bit of butter in a pan on the stove. Then again, perhaps happiness is in the eyes of our loved ones and we only need to look, to put on some music, take their hand, and dance."

Sweet.

Penny and Jamie

* And a few more!...Spotted Overcoat by Denise Janikowski-Krewal (poetry), Geoducks Are For Lovers by Daisy Prescott (there's a hot lumberjack in this book!), Against The Dark by Carolyn Crane, Walking With Sausage Dogs by Matt Whyman. Phew! I'm gonna be busy!

3. I am beta reading a rock star book by Bobbi Ruggiero (also known as Bobbi Baby) and Victoria Morgan's next historical.

4. Finally, I am about to get back to work on my own WIP, SWEET ADVENTURE (Klaus Brothers Series #3) which includes a tabloid reporter, super hunky blond-bearded toy designer Sven Klaus, a trip to the Arctic Circle, and some Yetis.

Happy Reading!
Penelope

Monday, April 29, 2013

Success Is The Best Revenge



Whew! Happy Monday! Conference is over. It was exhausting, fun, inspiring, and filled with yummy cocktails. Before I begin my awards ceremony, I would like to add one extra award...Bestest Hubby Ever. Which goes to my sweet husband of 23 years, Dr. B. When I got home, he had these gorgeous flowers waiting for me, to celebrate my successful workshop. I lub that guy!

And now it's time for Penelope's awards....


✯Penelope's 2013 NECRWA Conference Awards✯


✯ Silken Curtain Of Perfection Award....Bobbi Baby

✯ Best Gandy On A Stick Award....Gandy

Bobbi Baby With Gandy

✯ Most Likely To Burst Into Spontaneous Flames...Stephanie Estes Saccoccio

✯ Coolest Newb With Bad-Ass Book Idea...Jennifer Hallock (Go friend her at Facebook!)

✯ Best Friend Covered With 10,000 Melted Lindt Chocolate Truffle Balls Who Never Complained....Sam Wayland

Penny and Sam With Christmas Tree and Melted Chocolate


✯ Nicest Person Award (I think she also won this last year. And I'm going to predict she wins it next year, too)....Lena Goldfinch

✯ Best Real Tattoos...Traci Olsen

✯ Best Fake Tattoos...Penny Watson (#UNICORNSFORTHEWIN)

✯ Best Alcoholic Beverage....Moscow Mule and Pink Cosmo (tie for first place)


✯ Best Conversation About Diabolical Plan To Take Over The World...Marie Force

✯ Most Elegant-Looking Harlequin Author With Adorable Haircut...Barbara Wallace

✯ Best Beard...(excellent scruffiness and salt and pepper coloration...I'm giving it an A-)...CJ Lemire

✯ Best Story About A German Exchange Student And Dirty Dancing Lessons...Victoria Morgan



✯ Moderator Most Likely To Make A Hilarious Freudian Slip During Introductions...Liberty Blake

✯ Best Bump And Grind Partner...Michelle Libby

✯ Funniest Story About A Fried Chicken Smoke Ball And The Fire Department....Frances Stockton


✯ Raunchiest Erotica Author Who Looks Like A Cute Pixie In Vintage-Inspired Outfits....Cara McKenna

✯ Best Abdominal Work-Out....Laughing So Hard My Tummy Still Hurts

✯ Most Touching Speech...Caroline Linden

✯✯✯

I will wrap this up with a quick story about my workshop presentation DEAR PENELOPE. I had a moment of panic when I realized that A) the bar opened at 5:45, and B) my talk started at 5:45. Would I have enough time to get my cocktail before my workshop? Would they have enough girly drinks? Would the bartender be a cute guy named Chuck like last year? Well, the bar opened early, and disaster was narrowly avoided.

So, I go into the workshop room and it's filling up with people. I notice there are folks lined up out the door, but I can't really see into the hallway. The next thing I know our conference co-chair tells me she is opening up the partition between my room and the next ballroom to accommodate the extra people. I'm thinking...Well, it will be pretty empty, but at least everyone will have a seat. The wall slides open and the entire next room is packed with attendees--every seat filled, and more folks standing at the back of the room.

My jaw dropped open and my friend Sam laughed.

And I thought...Well hell, I guess I should have planned a real talk. Oops!

Needless to say, the talk was a roaring good time. We discussed social media, beards, Hugh Jackman, Lousy Book Covers, Paris Hilton and negative publicity, and even bigfoot orgy erotica. I'm sure it wasn't that different from Julia Quinn's talk. (*smirk*)

Thanks to everyone who made the weekend a wonderful time!


Victoria Morgan at book fair...She also wins Attendee Most Likely To Hand Out Pens



Happy Monday!
Penelope



Friday, April 26, 2013

See You Monday!



Off to conference! Hope all of you have a great weekend. I'll be schmoozing with some of the finest romance writers in New England, giving a workshop on social media and promotion, attending some cool classes, signing at book fair, and showing off my unicorn tattoo.

If any of you are in the Burlington, MA area on Saturday, please stop by for the book fair!

Happy Reading and Writing!
Penelope

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Monday, April 22, 2013

In Search Of Sequins


Trying to start off the week in a light-hearted manner. Although my heart still feels heavy and conflicted. But I'm working through it!

First up. I decided to read a kooky erotica to help lighten my mood this weekend...The Sweet Shoppe: Cowboy Up.  The heroine spends most of the book shoving chocolate fudge in her mouth. I was surprised she didn't weigh 392 pounds by the end of the book and need gastric bypass. Or at the very least a visit to the dentist. Every time she ate the fudge she had sex hallucinations.

That's right. I said fudge brought on sex hallucinations.

Well, by the end of the book she was addicted to fudge, the hero started eating the fudge, and eventually their sex hallucinations turned into real sex. I think.

The moral of the story? It's an erotica. There isn't a moral. But there sure was a lot of melted chocolate.

✵✵✵

Next up...Conference preparation! I am going to a romance writer's conference at the end of the week. Here is my to-do list:


1. Search for sequins.

2. Put together fun give-away basket.

3. Purchase sparkly unicorn tattoos and test them with my 10-year old daughter.

4. Assemble martini-making kit.


After I wrote this list, I had the feeling something was missing.

Oh yeah!

5. Prep talk for Friday night: Dear Penelope. I'm giving a workshop. Hee hee! The subtitle for this workshop is...What Would Stephen King Do? It should be fabulous and I hope to see some of you there.

✵✵✵

Finally, my reading list for the week:

1. Inspirational YA

2. Sweet contemporary cowboy story

3. Bigfoot orgy erotica


I know. I know. One of these things just doesn't belong. I blame Kitty Thomas for this. Somehow I got into a conversation on Twitter with her about nutty books, and the next thing I know she convinced me to read CUM FOR BIGFOOT. I ordered Cum For Bigfoot 2 because the blurb appealed to me, although Kitty is very concerned that I'm not reading them in order and that could affect my appreciation for this fine collection of bigfoot orgy erotica.


I was actually more concerned this poor girl was going to get a horrible case of poison ivy than about her interaction with the "horny, ape-like creatures" in the woods. But we shall see! I will let you all know how it goes.

I wonder if Bigfoot likes chocolate fudge?


*As a footnote, my good friend Bobbi Baby (Baby is not actually her surname, but I use it anyway) absolutely adores Kitty Thomas and her books. In fact, Bobbi often tortures me by relating the entire synopsis for her novels, knowing full well I can't handle anything dark and disturbing. In fact, after reading just the book blurb for Comfort Food, I signed up for a year's worth of psychotherapy appointments.

*unicorns* *rainbows* *unicorns* *rainbows*

However, if you like dark and edgy, I have heard great things about Comfort Food.

All right, folks! It's Monday! Here we go!

Penelope

Sunday, April 21, 2013

Boston Strong



I have too many conflicting thoughts and emotions right now to adequately address the horror, the shock, the heroism, the catastrophic events of this week in Boston.

I have pride in my city. I am in awe of the courage and heroism of so many people--ordinary citizens, law enforcement officers, doctors, neighbors, runners. Extraordinary events unfolded this week. And I don't think we will ever be the same.

But I will say this. And I believe this with all my heart. There are evil people in this world who cause unspeakable horror. But there are many more people with courage, with integrity, filled with goodness and kindness and love.

And that gives me hope.

I would like to thank all of my friends and colleagues and on-line pals who checked in with me to make sure my family was safe, to let me know that they were thinking of me and praying with all of Boston. It made a world of difference, and reinforced my belief that there is much more goodness in this world than evil.

Boston Strong!

Penelope





Wednesday, April 17, 2013

New England Romance Readers! Mark Your Calendar: April 27!


Something exciting is coming up on Saturday April 27! At the Burlington Marriott! In Burlington, Mass! From 3:30-5:30!


What's happening, Penelope?


There is going to be a big bunch of romance authors hanging out, signing books, chatting, and some of them will probably be wearing tiaras or sparkly unicorn tattoos. Or both!


Penny's tiara


Who will be there, Penelope?



Well, thanks for asking! Look at this amazing crew of writers...

❀❀❀

Julia Quinn Caroline Linden Hannah Howell
 Loretta Chase  Marie Force
   Tiffany Reisz   Sarah MacLean  
Cara McKenna Donna Alward Cathryn Parry 
Barbara Wallace Terri Brisbin Ella Drake
Ashlyn Chase Marissa Doyle 
Lesley Matthews Karen Stivali
Anna DeStefano Corrina Lawson 
Laura Moore Lena Goldfinch
Frances Stockton Judy Phillips 
Victoria Morgan Megan Frampton 
Liberty Blake Stephanie Queen 
Christina James Samantha Wayland
Jordan Rose Sammie Grace
Megan Caldwell Miranda Neville
Lisa Carlisle Jamie Cat Callan
 Kate Locke Amy Atwell
Kady Cross Wendy Marcus Rosza Gaston
Pepper Goodrich Lisa Verge Higgins
Cara Elliott Kate Cross Colleen Connally
KJ Montgomery Teresa Noelle Roberts
and finally
Penny Watson!




This is a once-in-lifetime opportunity for New England romance readers. Buy books, get autographs, take pics with your favorite authors. It should be a roaring good time!

I will post a reminder next Friday, but I just wanted to let everyone know this week so you all could make plans, get out your sequins, and hopefully make your way to Burlington next weekend.



Hope to see many of you at the Burlington Marriott 
April 27, 3:30-5:30!! (Hm. Is that happy hour?)
Penny




"A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men."  Willy Wonka



Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Music Of Mankind



"Today, rescuers were running toward the wounded on Boylston Street in acts of true heroism -- running toward the sound of the screams. In the end, the terrorists will fail because Bostonians did not turn from their fellow men -- they turned toward them. And that is the real music of mankind."

 Howard Fineman

Monday, April 15, 2013

Happy Patriots Day!


Happy Patriots Day! Here in Massachusetts we are celebrating the anniversary of the Battles of Lexington and Concord, the first battles of the American Revolutionary War.

It's also Boston Marathon Day. Good luck to all of the runners!

I have now officially entered the week known as SPRING BREAK. On the list for this week...

1. Spring cleaning.
2. Buying my daughter new clothes since she no longer fits into any of her stuff.
3. Reading Jesse Hayworth's novella Sunset at Keyhole Canyon (ARC)...coming out in May!


Jess Andersen, author of Harlequin medical stories and the UF series The Nightkeepers, is starting a cool new endeavor. She is publishing "fun, sassy contemporaries" as Jesse Hayworth. Why do I like this?

1. Jess is one of the nicest, most down-to-earth authors I have ever met.
2. I love the idea of an author branching out and trying new things. Not being afraid of risk.
3. We desperately need some positive stories in romance. I've personally had enough of the "a-hole hero" and that whole trend. Cripes.

Jesse Hayworth has her novella Sunset at Keyhole Canyon coming out in May.

Summer at Mustang Ridge is coming out in June.

And finally, Winter at Mustang Ridge will be out in December.

I can't wait to read these. Giddy up, cowboy! (I wonder if any of the cowboys have a beard? I'd even be happy with some scruff).

And finally, as my friend Sam Wayland put it, Twitter broke me.

Yes, it broke me like a wild stallion.

Too many negative, horrible news stories and links. Folks being mean and judgmental. I need something perky, dammit! Perky and happy and positive...and rainbows and unicorns...



Do you like my unicorn?

So, I started a new Twitter account. Please follow if you are so inclined! It's called @PerkyHappyStuff, and I will post only happy news. Cute puppy pics. Uplifting stories. Vintage Britney Youtube videos. If you have any happy news, send it my way.


In related news, I got my sparkly unicorn temporary tattoos from Amazon. I have to hide them from my 10 year old daughter.

Hope everyone has a great week!
Penny

Friday, April 12, 2013

Beard of the Day


Beard of the Day.

Ginger of the Day.

Hairy Beast of the Day.

Manliest Manly Ginger Beast of the Day Holding An Axe, With A Six-Pack and Bad-Ass Sunglasses.

Everyone say hello to Lucas Parker!

(HELLOOOOOOOO LUCAS!)

Lucas Parker is a 5'7" 185-pound Canadian CrossFit athlete who evidently has the nickname Teen Wolf.

If I got to nickname him, it would be Hairy Beast. Ginger Beast. Beard Master of Disaster.

I am also picturing him in a Scottish plaid on the cover of a romance novel.

*thunk*

Happy Beardy Friday!
Penelope

P.S. Lucas has a Twitter account! *Penny presses follow faster than the speed of sound*

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Penelope Percusses A Multitude of Pet Peeves With Some Perky Picks


The truth is...I had a whole blog post written about my pet peeves. Which are plentiful. Piercing. And problematic.

However.

I decided to push aside the profound protests, and focus on something positive and purifying. (I think I've run out of opportunities to use "p" words, although I really, really wanted to get the word "pusslike" in this post. I'll try later.)

So, without further ado (you're thinking THANK GOD!), here are some perky picks from Penelope...



1. Cupcakes




2. Robins (they're back! yay!)




3. If He's Tempted by Hannah Howell
(I really enjoyed the latest Wherlocke book by HH)




4. Tim McGraw




5. This hilarious Tumblr site: Reasons My Son Is Crying.





I hope everyone has a good day and avoids pusslike protrusions. I did it!

Pleasantly percolating,
Penelope



Friday, April 5, 2013

Beard of the Day


I think Shemar Moore is absolutely adorable! He is so rocking the scruff, the goatee, the FBI vest. Yowzah!

Here are some interesting things about Shemar....

1. He is multi-cultural! Yay!
2. He was a regular on The Young and the Restless.
3. He lived in Denmark.
4. He was the host of Soul Train from 1999-2003.
5. He is adorable.

And for the ladies, here is a pic with scruff and buff!



Happy Beardy Friday!
Penny

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Two Great Heroes: A Hipster and A Cowboy



One wears boots.

One wears flip flops.

One wears a duster.

One wears skinny jeans.

One drinks whiskey.

One drinks a latte from Starbucks.

Yes, there is quite a difference between a good old cowboy and a hipster, but both captured my attention this week. In a good way.

First...

Lady X's Cowboy by Zoƫ Archer.

One of my all-time favorite books is Warrior by ZoĆ« Archer. It is a fabulous mix of adventure, fantasy, and romance. Larger than life story. Larger than life characters. Lady X's Cowboy is an historical romance, and I wasn't sure what to expect. Well, Archer has put together a nice little story--with an interesting British widow heroine--caught between her life as a noble-by-marriage, and her position as the owner of a brewery. A lot of romance authors create weak heroines, but Archer isn't one of them. Her heroines are strong-willed, capable, and sensual at the same time.

Lady Olivia has a dilemma--a villain attempting to put her brewery out of business--and a delicious American cowboy shows up just in the nick of time to help save it. Will is scrumptious! Brazen, swaggering like a good cowboy should, a real gentleman, protective, and smarter than he lets on. He and Lady Olivia have some smoky hot chemistry, and a sweet romance develops between them.

This is quite different from Warrior. It's a more traditional historical romance. But I loved the fascinating bits about the brewery, I loved the determined heroine, and Will was the perfect American cowboy hero.

Julie Garwood has a book with a heroine raised by Native Americans and a British nobleman. It's one of her most underrated books, IMO. I love it--The Lion's Lady. There is something very appealing about mixing that rugged, rough and tumble American pioneer sensibility with the starchy upper crust British nobility. It provides great contrast and chemistry in the story. Garwood made it shine, and so does Archer. I would highly recommend Lady X's Cowboy to anyone looking for an American/British historical with some fascinating background about the brewing industry and a sexy H/h combination.

Grade: A

✯✯✯



Next...an unpublished story (hopefully published soon)...The Lonely Hipster by Ellis Drake.

What do you get when you mix one lonely hipster, a sweet barista, a creepy police chief, a well-intentioned mother, a bunch of shady characters, a mystery-that-must-be-solved, and an awesome sense of humor? The Lonely Hipster. I sure hope this gets published soon. It made me laugh out loud at least five times. Here's one of my favorite lines...

"Hands in the air. You're under arrest, you perverted hipster!"

I'm in love. With this story.

Grade: A

✯✯✯


Other books I bought this week....

The Fornarina Affair by Ellis Drake

Aire by Lena Goldfinch

Cool Shade by Theresa Weir

Tag Man: A Joe Gunther Novel by Archer Mayor

If He's Tempted by Hannah Howell

Heart-Shaped Box by Joe Hill

I have horror, mystery, romance, and YA. What a great mix!


Hope everyone is having a good week,
Penelope

Sunday, March 31, 2013

Happy Easter!



It's a day for ham and eggs and pancit (our favorite Filipino dish) and "peeps." Yuck! My kids asked for them, so I put them in their Easter baskets, but seriously. Peeps! Ack!

Hope everyone has a great day. It is sunny and gorgeous and spring-y here.

Yippeeeeee!!!!!

Happy Day,
Penny

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

In Praise Of Creativity


I don't watch very much television, but there are a few shows I love. Mostly centering around creative endeavors.

I used to be a huge Project Runway fan. I would actually get chills watching some of the designs walk down the runway. The final collection for Season One's Jay McCarroll was nothing short of phenomenal. Astounding. Creative, exciting. Gorgeous.

It was a kaleidoscope of colors, textures, and designs, which unfolded in a rainbow assortment before our eyes. It was like nothing I'd ever seen before. Unique and bold and brazen.

And I loved it.



The recent seasons have focused more on melodrama with the increasingly boring, tedious, and super annoying contestants, and less on the designs themselves. Which is probably good since the designs have been not only mediocre at best, but actually embarrassingly bad.

At its heyday, Project Runway took amazingly talented designers and gave them superb challenges. Using botanical items to create a runway look. Burlap sacks. And on and on. There is something magical about watching strips of foliage transform into a couture dress. It makes you feel like you are part of the creative process. That we are all capable of greatness. It reaffirms and inspires and cultivates our imaginations.

Top Chef is always popular at our house. Seeing these talented cooks create masterpieces from disparate ingredients and under adverse conditions--using vending machine food, cooking over a fire pit, preparing school lunches for kids using only healthy ingredients--is fabulous. I find the difference between Project Runway and Top Chef fascinating. Project Runway is a visual competition. We at home can see the clothing and make our own assessment of the success or failure of each design. With the food, we have to accept the judges' opinions as to taste and the success in that arena. We can see if the dishes are visually exciting, but ultimately we are depending on the judges' assessment of the food.

Nevertheless, I still find this show super entertaining and inspiring. I especially love the outside-of-the-box approach to cooking, and the self-taught chefs proving their worth. I love seeing how their minds work--looking at the ingredients in different ways. The color, the texture, the taste, how they can modify it, play with it, change it up, be silly or serious or deferential. The sky is the limit with every episode and dish.

And in startling contrast to the cattiness of Project Runway (although there are always exceptions to this), the contestants on this show usually help each other out and support each other. I find that refreshing and inspiring as well.

(The dish below was created by our favorite Sheldon Simeon, Filipino chef and total sweetheart. He posted this photo on his Facebook page. LOVE him!)



Our latest obsession is Face Off, on the Syfy Channel. My 10 year old daughter and I have been faithfully watching this season, and the hard work, creativity, technical achievements, and sheer imagination going into these designs are beyond impressive. You watch clay and plastic and paint and hair and fabric transform an ordinary model into something extraordinary, horrifying, alien, fantastical. And more than any other show we've seen, the camaraderie between the contestants on this show was heart-warming. They cheered for each other. They were kind to each other. They supported each other. This is the best possible world for folks involved in a creative field---they have mentors, friends, the proper tools and inspiration, and folks looking out for them and encouraging them. Bravo to SyFy for showing us this side of creativity, and what amazing results you can get from a positive experience.


Anthony Kosar's Finale Design
Photo from SyFy website, by Brett-Patrick Jenkins
(Photo at top of post is also from Face Off)

Does this mean all the designs are successful? Of course not. Some are failures. But the stories and people I find most fascinating are the ones who are crushed by the judges, get back up the next week, brush off their pants, and get back to work. They believe in themselves, their vision, and their talent.

This is also why I find fiction that pushes the envelope exciting and impressive. Instead of following the mold, dishing out the same old stuff, there are authors willing to take a chance. Add a cat's POV into the narrative. Create a hero with quirky flaws, outside of the same old formula. Mix up the structure of the novel. Challenge the reader.

Bravo to the authors willing to take a risk, try something different, create a bold new world.

And hopefully you'll find a posse of friends who support you, help you, encourage you, and spur on that creativity.


Hoping everyone has a bold and inspiring day,
Penelope

Monday, March 25, 2013

Dogs That Talk And Other Stuff


1. Easter is coming up! Natty and I spent yesterday working on three dozen eggs for our baskets. My husband's eye was twitching because we made such a huge mess. But we had a great time.

If you're looking for something sweet and silly and different for your kids' Easter baskets this year, why not order a copy of LUCY THE WONDER WEENIE? You could add a small plush weenie dog, too, just for fun!




2. As you all know, I love ridiculous movies. Somehow I missed the sheer excellence that is HOT TUB TIME MACHINE, starring John Cusack and assorted other hilarious actors. Dear Lord! It was utterly fabulous, set in the 1980s, and chock full of delicious gems like this...(my favorite quote)...

"I write Stargate fan fiction. I think I know what I'm talking about."




Penelope Highly Recommends watching this movie if you have fond memories of the 80s, like John Cusack, asinine humor, and lots of cocktails. A winner!


3. First I read a book with a cat's POV (The Girl With The Cat Tattoo by Theresa Weir). Then, I read a book with a dog's POV---The Love Dog by Elsa Watson. The premise for this novel is really cute. A tabloid reporter goes undercover on a reality TV show that features a "love dog" who brings together fractured couples. The suspense portion of this story was high...the entire time you're worried that Samantha's cover will be blown. Watson did a good job wrapping up this difficult conflict at the end.

I'm not gonna lie. My favorite character, by far, was the dog Apollo. He was super sweet, loving, and adorable, and I was stressed out thinking he would not get his HEA. (I was more worried about Apollo and his HEA than the human characters in the story). Well, the ending was PERFECTION! True love and happiness for all, human and canine alike. I do think the H/h of this book took a back seat to the dog and his quest to make people happy. But the magic of this story was the dog, and getting his charming POV added the pop into this book.

Grade: B+

I think I am now addicted to books with animals' POVs and must find more!





All righty folks...time for another exciting Monday! Hope y'all have a great week.

Penelope

Thursday, March 21, 2013

Two Out Of Three Ain't Bad



I read three self-pubbed books in the last couple of days.

Two were fabulous, one was not. Let's start with the good news!

1. Edge by Tiffinie Helmer

I almost DNFed this book at the first chapter. It starts with a disturbing scene with a poor girl who has been abducted by a religious fanatic. However, I stuck with it because I trusted Tiffinie to do right by this story. And she did. Edge is a fabulous romantic suspense--the perfect balance of suspenseful storyline, engaging romance, interesting secondary characters, and incredible setting--the Alaskan wilderness. I felt like I was breathing in the frigid cold air right along with the characters. The setting popped off the page, and it was the ideal backdrop for this story. The writing was smooth and professional, the material handled perfectly. And that's a big deal for me. Too many writers add unnecessary graphic detail when dealing with difficult subject matter like abduction, rape, etc. A lot of times it feels gimmicky to me--like a crappy horror movie throwing in guts and violence for the hell of it. Helmer handles Mel's past with a light touch...we get just enough information to know that she was traumatized, but not enough to detract from her strength and healing. Cache, the hero, is a fantastic character, flawed, also tortured by his past, and the ultimate mate for Mel. I loved the two of them together, I loved the resolution to the story, and I loved how Helmer tackled prickly family issues and a secondary love story, too. And we even get a bad-ass bear scene. Awesome!

Grade: A-


2. Penelope by Anya Wylde

Also self-published, Penelope is an adorable historical farce. The humor is way over the top...there is a highway robber, a goat, a cross-dressing spy, a hilarious uncle with a mustache obsession, and a sweet, lonely heroine who is longing for love, companionship, and friendship. Penelope is adorable, goofy, and good-hearted. Folks looking for what I like to call "reality-based fiction" will probably not like this one. You need to check your willing suspension of disbelief at the door, and then laugh yourself silly while you read. I was charmed. There was one formatting error (with the indents) that hopefully will be fixed soon, and the hero was a little bit too conflicted for a good portion of the book. But other than that, there are many sweet and funny scenes that are a testament to Anya Wylde's imagination and sense of humor. I love a good farce, and this one fits the bill.

Grade: B+/A-


3. Spanked by the Vet by Christa Wick

I love big, curvy girl erotica stories. I love heroes who are veterinarians. I love quickies that are satisfying and sexy. And I love a good spanky story (so sue me).

Well, this erotica had a big curvy heroine and a veterinarian hero. It also had a good premise--the whole friends to lovers thing. Unfortunately, it also had no ending, no real story, about 95% sex, and the sex was boring--I ended up skimming those scenes. All in all, not my cuppa spanky tea. This story had a lot of potential, but it just didn't work for me.

Grade: Penelope Is A Sad Panda


Coming up on the reading horizon...

The Love Dog by Elsa Watson...I won it from Books and Things. After reading a book recently with a cat's POV, I'm looking forward to this one--it has a POV from the golden retriever. Hee hee!

Enjoying the self-pubbed revolution,
Penelope

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Winners!



I have two winners who will be receiving FOR THE LOVE OF A SOLDIER by Victoria Morgan...

Congrats to FALLEN STAR and WATCH4BIRDS! I will send both of you emails and you can let me know if you would like an ebook or print book (if you live in the US).

Thanks so much to everyone who entered the give-away!

Also, Julia Rachel Barrett has an interesting post today about what "indie" means...stop by and leave a comment.


I will have reviews up soon for three books I read this week. 1 dud, 2 winners!

All my best,
Penelope


Monday, March 18, 2013

Sweet Freedom!




I finally finished camp applications, tax forms, and a whole bunch of other stuff that has been hanging over my head for weeks!

 ❊ SWEET FREEDOM! ❊


I also had a fantastic time at the Maine RWA meeting this past weekend. What a great group of women writers. We talked about how to use reviews for good instead of e-villlllll! And I got a big surprise. Steph from Fangs, Wands and Fairydust was there, too. We finally met in person and she was a terrific help at the meeting.

If any New Englanders are looking for a writer's retreat this spring, MERWA is hosting their annual retreat May 17-18 at the Embassy Suites in Portland, Maine. Sounds really fun. Here's the linkie!

To celebrate my new-found freedom, I downloaded some festive new books.

* Spanked by the Vet by Christa Wick
* Edge by Tiffinie Helmer
* Penelope by Anya Wylde

So, I have a spanky book, an Alaskan romance, and a kooky historical. Can't wait!

Other good news...

Eloisa James gave LUCY THE WONDER WEENIE a nice shout-out on her Facebook page this weekend. She also has an adorable rescue doxie named Lucy.

LUCY THE WONDER WEENIE is on sale at both Barnes and Noble and Amazon for only $7.65. And it's still just 99 cents for the Kindle version!

Finally, I realized my hectic pace this year has resulted in stress-induced shingles and throwing out my back--twice! So I decided to slow down. I'm going to work on SWEET ADVENTURE, the next Klaus Brothers book which isn't due until Christmas 2013. That gives me plenty of time to get it written, edited, formatted, covered, and ready for action! I can't believe I'm saying this, but I actually sort of miss the Klaus family and I'm looking forward to writing about the North Pole again. Even though it's March and Starbucks no longer has their gingerbread lattes.

NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! *Penny cries*

Hope that everyone has a happy week!
Penelope




Friday, March 15, 2013

A Couple of Grovels and A Kicky-Ass Cat



I have three quickie reviews for you today. Two are "grovel" books and one is a terrific quirky story that includes a cat's POV.

I'm going to rush through the grovels, which I saw recommended on an Amazon thread, because they weren't stellar.

1. The Billionaire's Pregnant Mistress by Lucy Monroe

Meh.

(Mistress gets pregnant, Greek dude promises dying grandfather he will marry some Greek chick and dumps mistress, mistress runs away, Greek dude realizes he's a big schmo and grovels for the rest of the book, yada yada yada, HEA).

Meh.

2. Forgiveness by Allyson Young

Meh and an eye roll.

(Woman involved with two men gets set up as a corporate spy, two horny dudes who love to "take care of their woman" get duped and have meaningless sex with her, which breaks her little heart, and she runs away, horny dudes realize they were wrong and that they're big stupid schmoes, they find her, kidnap her, grovel, grovel, grovel, she hates them hates them hates them, they finally give up, she shows up at their house and they have an HEA).

Eye roll.

3. Now for the good one! If I could, I would give The Girl With The Cat Tattoo by Theresa Weir....

5000 STARS!


But I can't. (At least not on Goodreads). So, I gave it 5 stars. This book is freakin' adorable. It's quirky, cute, funny, romantic, even has a cool suspense storyline. The funky cat has a POV and does a moon walk. The heroine dresses up like Pippi Longstocking for story time at the library. The hero is the perfect alpha-beta mix of hot undercover cop and volunteer at the homeless shelter. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? All he needs is a Paul Bunyan beard and he is perfect, baby! (I just pretended he had a beard while I was reading the book!)

Anyhoo, huge thanks to Brie from Romance Around The Corner for recommending this book to me. And another huge thanks to Nico Jaye for loaning it to me. It is now FREE on Amazon for Kindle!

After reading two formulaic grovel books, this book was a breath of fresh quirky air, low on the angst, high on the fun, silly, and adorable. It was so right up my alley, I was laughing out loud while I read it.

I loved it.

And I don't even like cats.

If you're looking for something different this weekend to read, I HIGHLY recommend this gem of a book.

Brilliant!

Grade: 5000 stars

Moonwalking,
Penelope

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Best Compliment of the Decade



Best compliment ever, from bud Sam Wayland....



"In a sea of ladies wearing cardigans and pearls, you're Diane Keaton flinging F-bombs."



Works for me!


Have a great quirky, funky, different, march-to-your-own-tune, rebellious day!

Penelope





Sunday, March 10, 2013

Sunshine + Gray Clouds



Stuff that makes me happy...

1. The new Star Trek trailer -- PUNCH IT, BABY!

2. I'm speaking at the Maine RWA meeting on Saturday! Yippeeeeee! I hope to see some of you there. I love Maine and I'm really looking forward to a nice weekend away.

3. This dress by Oscar De La Renta...it is so romantic, it's ridiculous.


4. My daughter's comment, after watching Oz, Great and Powerful...

"Just for once I'd like the bad guys to win."

5. Junior Mints.




Stuff that makes me sad...

1. Stories about people abusing dogs.

2. This outfit...



3. Cold, snowy, windy, blizzard-y, icy, hideous weather in March when I'm ready for this...



4. The realization that something that used to be a positive and wonderful part of my life is now a source of stress and negativity. And that I have to cut it out of my life like a chunk of moldy cheese.

5. Hoarders. That show is like a train wreck you can't stop watching until you're curled up in the fetal position.


So, this week is going to be about focusing on a sunny, positive future, and eliminating the gray clouds.


All my best,
Perky Penelope


Friday, March 8, 2013

Do Not Look Out The Window



...unless you want to see a snowstorm.

*SHUDDER*

Instead, let's close our eyes and pretend we're about to sit down on one of these chairs, and drink this delicious beverage...


In a pineapple! With one of those fun little paper umbrellas! Yes!


And this dude is our waiter...



And he's our own personal cabana boy. Yes! And we're staying in one of these cool beach houses over the water...




And this is our sunset...


HAPPY FRIDAY!

Penelope