Penelope's Updates: Contest Winner, Blog Hoppin' and Firemen With Glasses

Good morning to all! First up, I would like to announce the winner of the $25 Amazon giftcard (just in time for Christmas shopping!)....thanks to everyone who stopped by and checked out the teaser for Sweet Adventure.

✵✵Congrats to Juju of Tales of Whimsy...you're the lucky winner! Merry Christmas!✵✵

Next up....my blog hoppin' schedule. Stop by Babbling by Books to enter a giveaway and ogle Eric Bana. Today (12/14) I will be at Sandra Sookoo's blog sharing a tasty Christmas cookie recipe. On Monday 12/20, I'll be visiting DIK....well, actually Oskar Klaus will be visiting and discussing the pros and cons of being Santa's son. On Thursday 12/23, I'll be at Book Chick City, doing a "Where Stories Are Made" post...you'll get to see photos of my holiday-inspired office, including antique Christmas decorations from my Nana. And I'll be discussing how I stay focused on writing a series about Santa Claus even when it's a hot and muggy summer day! I'll also be visiting Ex Libris within the next couple of weeks, date to-be-determined.

Finally, my obsessive holiday reading extravaganza continues. It's a sickness I tell you, a sickness! Anyhoo, my latest Christmas erotica is KT Grant's fun, sexy story The Christmas Fantasy. Grant does a great job creating a plus-size heroine (Mandy) who is struggling with her new identity. She has lost a huge amount of weight, but insecurities still linger. Jackson, the sexy firefighter she pines for, thinks she's gorgeous and desirable just the way she is. (I love you, Jackson!) Not only does he dispel her lingering doubts about her own sexiness, he is determined to forge an emotional bond between them. Mandy's self-doubts are spot on and totally believable for a woman coming to terms with her new body. Jackson is a fantastic hero...he's sexy, protective, he wears glasses (yee haw!) and he's a firefighter, for God's sake. Schwing! My favorite bits in the story are when Mandy dances around after her first encounter with Jackson (so cute!), and when Jackson realizes he's fallen in love with the heroine, and wants the whole enchilada with her, not just sex. That's my kind of hero, and my kind of erotica.

If only all of us could have a glasses-wearing, sexy firefighter hellbent on our sexual pleasure for a Christmas present. It would be a very, merry Christmas indeed. ☺☺☺

Grade: A-

Hope all of you are gearing up for the big day! Please stop by and visit me on my blog tour...I would love to see you!

Penelope

Penelope's Top 20 List for 2010

Yep, 2010 has been a doozy. Aside from the near-death experience (!!!!), it also had some interesting romance reading.

Here's Penelope's Top 20 for 2010:

1. Best New-To-Me Sub-Genre: Amish romance. A Simple Amish Christmas by Vannetta Chapman was an unexpected pleasure...sweet, romantic, and the hero has a beard. What more could a girl ask for?

2. Best Debut Novel: No contest. Carolyn Crane's phenomenal UF masterpiece Mind Games blew me right out of the water. The totally original, quirky and satisfying novel was ridiculously brilliant. Bravo, Carolyn!

3. The Best Book I Never Read: Lover Mine by JR Ward? I appear to have fallen off the JR Ward bandwagon, and I'm not sure when I'll get back on.

4. Best Quickie: Lena Goldfinch's The Language of Souls was just a gorgeous book. Beautifully written, and utterly romantic. I loved the symbolism, and I adored the final perfect kiss.

5. Best Fictional Beard: Ian from Robyn Carr's A Virgin River Christmas. A big ole lumber-jack style beard. And it's red. Win!

6. Best Tortured Hero: Malkom from Kresley Cole's Demon from the Dark. An abused blood slave, on the verge of sanity....a true savage hero. His path to redemption was that much sweeter (and sexier).

7. Biggest Disappointment: Blameless by Gail Carriger. Soulless was one of my favorite reads of the year. The delicious chemistry between Alexia and Conall was just too good to be true. The fact that Carriger kept these two characters apart until the bitter end of Blameless was an enormous misstep.

8. Most Totally Unexpected Kick Ass Book With Most Unlikely Heroine And Hero: Skin Game by Ava Gray. When I started reading this book, I didn't think I was going to like it. Or the characters. By the end, I was completely absorbed and praying for their HEA. Amazingly fabulous book.

9. Most Insane Temporary Reading Obsession: Tie between "Tycoon" books and aliens. What the hell was I thinking?

10. Biggest Bunch Of Marshmallow Fluff: Julia Quinn's Ten Things I Love About You. The Bridgerton series seems a lifetime ago.

11. Favorite Mystery: Annette Blair's Death By Diamonds. Vintage clothes, cool paranormal heroine, and a yummy love triangle made this the most adorable mystery I read in 2010.

12. Coolest Paranormal Descriptions: Water Bound by Christine Feehan. Rikki's affinity for water was spell-binding and awe-inspiring. Now that's what I'm talking about!

13. Favorite Christmas Read: A Virgin River Christmas by Robyn Carr. This book was so emotionally satisfying. And Ian was one of my favorite heroes of the year...a wounded gentle ex-soldier healed by the love of a good woman. Sigh.

14. Best Historical: A tie between The Endearment by LaVyrle Spencer and Lady Isabella's Scandalous Marriage by Jennifer Ashley. Both of these books were beautiful love stories.

15. Most Heroic Ferret In A Romance Novel: Dodger, in Married By Morning by Lisa Kleypas.

16. Favorite Recommendation By Another Blogger: Julia Barrett's Beauty and the Feast, recommended by Mandi at Smexybooks. Not only did I love this book, I love Julia, too...she's a total sweetheart and a wonderful writer. Good pimpin, Mandi!

17. Best Sex Scene: The bath scene in Kresley Cole's Demon from the Dark. Holy Macarena! Soap me up, Malkom. Come on, you know you wanna....

18. Best Heroine: This is a toughie. Runner-up for this category is Rikki in Water Bound. Christine Feehan took a huge chance creating an autistic heroine, but her risk totally panned out. Rikki is strong, loving, loyal and brave. She's a wonderful heroine. But my favorite heroine of the year goes to Denise in Jeaniene Frost's First Drop Of Crimson. Some other readers were not digging this book--it's quite different from Frost's Night Huntress series. But I thought this book was great, especially Denise, an ordinary woman thrown into extraordinary circumstances. Not only was she completely determined to save her family and Spade, I loved that she made a point to save another character who was unfairly slated for death. That was a truly heroic act.

19. Best Hero: My favorites for the year...Conall, the growly, sexy alpha werewolf from Soulless. Spade from First Drop of Crimson. Malkom, tortured sexy soul from Demon from the Dark. Aidan, hunkalicious Irish hero from Nora Robert's Jewels of the Sun. But my #1 favorite for the year is Lev from Water Bound. When Christine Feehan nails it, she nails it. Lev is a stone cold killer who is incredibly patient and understanding with the autistic woman he loves. Lev and Rikki's love story is a perfect example of Christine Feehan's mastery of the romance genre.

20. Best Book: I love the unexpected. Gail Carriger's Soulless was a mix of steampunk inventions, paranormal politics, had a wicked sense of humor, a hilarious heroine, and a sexy werewolf hero. It was delicious. Skin Game was a wild, sometimes violent, sexy, suspenseful ride. These were both in the running for best read of 2010. But my absolute favorite for the year is Carolyn Crane's Mind Games. The premise is stunningly original, the storyline fascinating, the characters compelling, the writing superb. I was pissed off when it was over. Something tells me Carolyn Crane is just beginning her ascent to literary greatness. In my not so humble opinion.

All my best,

Penelope

Beard of the Day

Despite his cuss-filled tirade on the Terminator Salvation set, his disturbing choice of movie roles (American Psycho) and his penchant for severe weight loss, Christian Bale is a hottie. Especially with this nicely groomed beard. There's something about his look that appeals to me...he's got a little bit of a naughty boy inside of him (clearly evident by the cuss-filled tirade). But he also looks intelligent, masculine, sexy. And even though the beard is nicely trimmed, you get the feeling he's holding back a wild man.

Yowzah!

Hope everyone has a great weekend. I am juggling an 8 year old's birthday party at Plaster Fun Time and son's swim meet. And reading some naughty erotica (KT Grant's The Christmas Fantasy).

Peace,

Penny

I'm Viral, Baby!

No, no, no. I don't have swine flu. My satirical post about the Amazon romance boards appears to have struck a nerve. Thanks to Babbling About Books, Read React Review, and Smart Bitches, I've had a boatload of traffic to my post. Thanks to all! Glad you like it.

Here are my random updates...

1) Daughter celebrated her 8th birthday yesterday. On her wishlist....high heel stiletto black books and a huge diamond brooch. What she got...an American girl doll. Happy Birthday!

2) I've been in a re-reading frenzy. Finished Rachel Gibson's Simply Irresistible (alpha male jock and prissy run-away bride get it on), Christine Feehan's Predatory Game (awesome Ghostwalker book with hero in wheel chair...it's fabulous!), and Mary Balogh's Under the Mistletoe anthology....I re-read "A Family Christmas," probably my all time favorite holiday novella. So romantic!

3) Speaking of Christine Feehan, I emailed her (again) to ask when she was going to write Skyler's story. She answered (again)...."I don't know when their story will be told. I only know that when it is time I will be able to feel it and then I will write their story." UGH! Feel it now, CF! Feel it now!!!!!!!

4) I will be visiting Not Another Romance Blog today for an interview, guest blog post and cooking lesson by Nicholas and Lucy Klaus, and a giveaway! Please stop by for the festivities. Rita is having a month long blog party for the holidays.

5) Also, today is the last day for my giveaway. Please check out the teaser for Sweet Adventure, leave a comment for me or any of the Klaus brothers, and you will be entered to win!

6) I picked up my Christmas cards yesterday. They spelled my son's name wrong. $#%@^#% Okay, now I have to wait for a rush order with the corrected cards. Clear blue ocean, clear blue ocean.....

Hope to see you at Not Another Romance Blog!

Penny

A Day In The Life Of The Amazon Romance Boards

New Topic: Big Breasted Heroines

Jeni: Hi! I really, really love books with big breasted heroines. Any recommendations for me? Thanks!

Cin: Have you tried Susie Q's series, Big Breasted Babes In Love? It's chock full of them.

Mari: Hi Jeni! Also, Susie W's book Lusting for Cari is a good one. I think the heroine is a 32CC, not huge, but still....big enough.

JK: 32CC is not big breasted.

Adam: Hi everyone! Hope you are all having a nice day. I thought you might be interested in my new book, The History of Bosnia. I released it today on the Kindle. Please give it a try. Thanks, Adam

Tami: I just read a fun vampire/werewolf/Amish/UF/steampunk spanky erotica called Dark. All of the 14 heroines had super big breasts. It was the source of their paranormal powers. I would definitely recommend this one. Good luck, Jeni

Gigi: Adam...this is a ROMANCE board. No one gives a flying f**k about the history of Bosnia. Go find some losers in the history section.

Tina: I just read a book with a small breasted heroine, called Sally and Bobby. Bobby has a nice chest, too.

JK: Stay on topic, Tina. We are looking for BIG breasts. Sheesh. I am down-voting your post.

Tami: JK, don't be such a b*tch.

Adam: FYI, The History Of Bosnia just got a 5 star review from my mother. Here's the link. I hope you'll consider my book. I worked on it for twelve years.

Gigi: Adam, GET OUT! We hate you. Like we give a sh*t about your mother's opinion. Get a freakin' life, loser.

Kati: Jeni, do you consider 36 DDD big enough? My twin sister Betti just wrote a book called Love in the Afternoon. She's an independent author and her book is great. The heroine's breasts are quite large and bouncy.

Jeni: Thanks for all the recommendations! I am going to check them out now...

Marci: Jeni, do you like PR? UF? w/ HEA? or M/M/M/F?

Adam: What language are you speaking?

Dotti: I read a Christian inspirational recently with a large-bosomed lady, called The Loneliest Rose. She was terribly self-conscious. It was troubling.

Jami: How about Outlander?

Marci: Why is it that Outlander is recommended on every board? Huh? For God's sake people, give it a rest. Outlander is not that great.

Gigi: Outlander is the greatest book ever published. I'm down-voting your post, Marci.

Marci: Oh, great, it's the We-Love-Outlander brigade. I'm down-voting your post, Gigi. You b***h!

Jasaminda: Hi! I just read a fascinating book about the history of Bosnia. Some of the characters have big breasts. It's really, really good. You should all go out and buy it right now.

Gigi: Jesus H. Christ, Adam. How stupid do you think we are? Jasaminda? GET OUT! We hate you, we hate Bosnia, we hate history books, we hate indie authors. I am down-voting your post, Jassy, and I'm reporting your spam to Amazon.

Jojo: Hi everyone! This is a great topic. I just read a book called Forever Yours, by Susie B. The heroine, and all of her sisters, and their cousins, and neighbors, too, had large knockers. Although, the book sort of sucked. But it does fit Jeni's criteria.

Patsi: Why the obsession with large breasts? Do breasts really define a woman? Her sexuality? Her desirability? I think other attributes are more important than breast size. Like creamy skin, luminescent eyes, and silky hair with lots of low lights and high lights.

Gigi: I'm down-voting your post, Patsi.

Tami: Kick it down a notch, Gigi. Did you take your lexapro today?

Staci: Hi Jeni! I just wrote a book called Lovers in Love. The heroine has large breasts. It's a wonderful and heart-warming and sexy story. Please check it out. Thanks!

WBJ: Oh for Christ's sakes! Will you indie authors get out of here! You are not welcome. You are not following Amazon guidelines and you are an abomination against all of mankind.

Staci: Pardon me? My book perfectly fits the criteria for this thread. Bite me, WBJ.

Gigi: I'm down-voting Staci's posts.

JK: You go, girl!

Chichi: Never mind them, Staci. The Promo Police try to squash us, undermine our creative impulses, destroy our spirits, and crush our hopes of ever having anyone besides our mothers purchase our books. But we independent authors will not be broken!!!!!!

Daisy: Go, Chichi!

Meggie: That's right, sistah! Indie Authors Forever!

Gigi: Where do these skanky indie ho's from hell come from? Seriously. They are KILLING me.

Kitti: Jeni, do you like back-door action (in your books, I mean...LOL!). If so, Gerald's Lust is a good book for you. The heroine has massive boobies. Hope you like it!

Jeni: Thanks, Kitti!

Tami: Did you write that book, Kitti? Just wonderin'....

Kitti: No. I'm not a writer. I'm have a doctorate in genetics and biochemistry from Harvard. I just happen to enjoy erotica with plenty of back-door action as a past time. What's it to you?

Adam: Hi Jeni-- I just re-wrote my book, The History Of Bosnia. I included several characters with large breasts. Please consider buying my book. I am begging you.

Babi: My favorite themes are death, murder, child abduction, rape and pillaging, and triads. Does anyone have a recommendation for me?

Tami: Babi, this is not appropriate for this thread. Please try to stay on topic. You can start another thread to discuss these types of books.

Cin: Actually, someone already did. Here's the link.

Barbi: My cat died today.

Joanie: Barbi, so sorry about that! Did your cat have big breasts?

Jeni: Well, thanks to everyone for your suggestions. My TBR pile is growing and growing! I think I'll start with The History Of Bosnia.

Adam: God bless you, Jeni. Will you marry me?

Naughty and Nice

I am continuing with my obsessive holiday reading extravaganza!

First, the "naughty" selection: Evangeline Anderson's Kidnapped For Christmas. It's your typical holiday story...girl meets boy (by being kidnapped), boy spanks girl and gives her the best sexual experience of her life, girl falls in love with boy (after a few minutes), boy and girl have a huge misunderstanding involving a diabetic cat's name (which also happens to be the "safe word" for their BDSM play, unbeknownst to the girl), boy and girl pine for each other for three long, lonely weeks, girl shows up at boy's place of work in a trench coat and sexy lingerie, boy and girl make up with a spanking and sex-on-a-table, girl invites boy to her family's Christmas party.

So, here's what I liked about it...the heroine is "curvy" (not a skinny supermodel) and the hero is totally hot for her. The sex is spicy, the BDSM is "light" (not too crazy), and even though this story really has absolutely nothing to do with Christmas, it's a fun, sexy read. I just find the whole idea of these two "falling in love" pretty ludicrous (as far as I know, it takes more than some spanking to fall in love), but other than that I thought this was an entertaining read.

Grade: B/B+

Now, for the "nice" book: The First Love Cookie Club by Lori Wilde. Even though I am starting to dread contemporary romances, I thought I would give this one a try. Lots of folks are recommending it.

What I liked...the story is very sweet, very sentimental, and chock full of Christmas-y themes. The hero is fabulous...I love him...charming, sexy, an incredible, loving father, and....did I mention sexy? Unfortunately, I wasn't digging the heroine...she was sort of irritating, and frankly, I couldn't figure out why the hero thought she was so great. There was too much deep POV in here (which happens a lot with contemporary romances, and it drives me nuts), but otherwise the ending was very satisfying. I was hoping for an epilogue with a wedding, to bring their mystical dreams to life, but we didn't get one. Oh well. Overall, a very sweet holiday tale.

Grade: B/B+

Think I might check out Mary Balogh's new Christmas anthology next. I'll be sad when December is over!

Penelope

Oh My God, They're Back Again....

It's December! Yee haw! The countdown to Christmas has commenced, and the Klaus Brothers are here to celebrate. Penelope is hosting a Christmas party today, and will be giving away an Amazon gift certificate to one lucky commenter. For those of you not familiar with the Klaus boys, let me introduce you....

Nicholas Klaus: eldest son of Santa Claus, master pastry chef; runs Klaus Küche (bakery) in the North Pole

Sven Klaus: 2nd oldest son, Chief Toy Designer and Woodworker; hippy, environmentalist

Wolfgang Klaus (aka Wolfie): middle son, Director of Charitable Donations, general do-gooder; travels around the world helping needy children

Gregor Klaus: financial guru for Klaus Enterprises; likes designer duds and gourmet coffee

Oskar Klaus: youngest son, punk snowboarder and Director of Elfin Resources; likes tats, parties and snow bunnies (not necessarily in that order)

You can read all about Nicholas and his unexpected soul mate in Sweet Inspiration (The Klaus Brothers Series #1). Oskar's story will be available next Christmas...it's called Sweet Magik (The Klaus Brothers Series #2). And as a freebie for this Christmas, I posted a teaser for Sweet Adventure (The Klaus Brothers Series #3) on my website.

TO ENTER THE CONTEST....

Please stop by my website and check out my free "quickie"...the teaser for Sweet Adventure. It's available as a pdf download. Give it a quick read, then leave a comment here on this post-- any time until Dec. 8, letting me (and the Klaus Brothers) know what you thought. That's it! You'll be entered in the giveaway drawing.

Without further ado, here are the Klaus Boys....

(MUSIC PLAYING IN BACKGROUND..... "Oh my God, we're back again...." by the Backstreet Boys.....)

Oskar: Holy crap, I think Penny is playing the Backstreet Boys....

Sven: (raises eyebrow) How old is she again?

Penny: Hey! No comments about my age, hippy boy!

Gregor: I'm begging you to turn off the ipod. Here's a Harry Connick, Jr. Christmas CD. Try this. Jazzy and cool.

Nicholas: Who are the Backstreet Boys?

Oskar: (cracks up) Never mind, Nick. You don't want to take up important brain cell function with the answer to that question. Believe me.

Penny: (rolls eyes) Fine. I'll just pop in the Celine Dion Holiday Collection....

All Klaus Brothers: Nooooooo!!!!!!!!

Penny: What a bunch of whiners.

Wolfie: Here, Pen. It's the classic Bing Crosby Christmas CD. I don't think this is too offensive. (winks at Penny)

Penny: (smiles at Wolfie) You are looking fine today, Wolf Man. Been working out? (squeezes his massive biceps and blushes)

Sven: Jay-sus. Penny is back to her old tricks. By the way, just what is up with that Teaser you wrote? Please tell me that irritating freelance writer is not going to be my....my...you know....

Nicholas: Soul mate?

Wolfie: Heart's desire?

Gregor: Life partner?

Oskar: Diva-licious bombshell of love?

Penny: (smirks) Well, Sven, I guess you'll just have to wait and see. I'm busy writing Sweet Adventure right now. And Gregor....

Gregor: Hmm...yes?

Penny: You're in it, too.

Gregor: (blanches) What? What exactly is that supposed to mean?

Penny: (wags eyebrows) That irritating freelance writer, Andi De Luca...Well, she has a sister. A really hot sister. Just sayin'....

Gregor: (rubs goatee thoughtfully) How hot is she?

Oskar: You're kidding right? You know Penny likes to torture us in her books. I can only imagine the hell I'm going to suffer in Sweet Magik.

Wolfie: How bad could it be?

Sven: (snickers) Maybe Penny will stick him with a nerdy librarian or something...

Nicholas: That's a diabolical thought. One with thick glasses and a bun in her hair...

Penny: (remains suspiciously quiet)

Oskar: Whaaaaa???? Why is Penny not saying anything? (shakes his head) I'm sure my lady love is a snow bunny. Or maybe that girl I met in Vegas....

Penny: You'll be surprised, that's for sure. But in a good way.

Wolfie: (laughing) You should see the look on your face, O. (fist bumps his brothers)

Oskar: Freakin' hilarious, bro.

Penny: All right. Let's encourage our guests to check out the teaser for Sweet Adventure. Here's the description....

Laid back hippy Sven Klaus has finally met his match. Andi "The Pit Bull" De Luca is a reporter determined to uncover the secrets behind Klaus Enterprises....

Please enjoy the teaser and leave a comment letting us know what you think. Nicholas, Sven, Wolfie, Gregor and Oskar will be here today to chat.

Thanks so much for stopping by!

Penelope

Christmas Is Coming, The Goose Is Getting Fat.....

The countdown to Christmas has begun! Woo hoo! My daughter celebrated this weekend by purchasing an aquamarine mini-tinsel tree for her bedroom. It's sparkly, it's cheesy, it says...Christmas is coming!

Here are my exciting updates!

1) The Klaus Boys are back! On Wednesday, Dec. 1, I am hosting a party with the five Klaus sons (Nicholas, Sven, Gregor, Wolfie and Oskar). My freebie teaser for Sweet Adventure is available on my website....please check it out and leave a comment for the Klaus Brothers on Wednesday, and you might win a $25 Amazon gift certificate. Merry Christmas!

2) For those of you concerned about my dachshund Lucy...rest assured, she has experienced a miraculous recovery. I am giving thanks.....

3) I finished the Amish holiday romance, A Simple Amish Christmas by Vannetta Chapman. It was heading for a 5 star review, until the end, which was too abrupt. Other than that, I found the story very sweet and romantic. And....the hero has a beard! (Well, he is Amish...what do you expect?). I would definitely recommend this one for anyone looking for a sweet, rated G holiday story.

4) Gaby from Oh My Books! gave Sweet Inspiration a great review. "This book is perfect if you want to get in the Christmas mood...it's a perfect light romantic read, excellent for Christmas." Yay! I love getting good reviews!

Hope to see everyone on Wednesday...the Klaus boys are a lively bunch!

Penelope

Get Better, Lucy!

Beware to pet-owners everywhere! My poor, sweet, lovely doxie Lucy almost died yesterday after she ate a tiny bit of mold-infested pumpkin. Evidently, the toxins from this mold can cause a severe reaction in small dogs. Lucy is recovering in the pet hospital, and I am praying she is back home soon. What a bittersweet Thanksgiving Day. Oy. I hope our Christmas is melodrama-free. One of the best parts of my day is snuggling with Lucy before I put her to bed. I missed my fluff-bunny last night. Dogs are good for the soul.

Get Better Lucy!

Penelope

Penelope's Sunday Update

1.) Spawn of Satan (my Volvo) is finally being laid to rest. Picking up my new car (Acura MDX) tomorrow. Yay!

2.) Finished Hannah Howell reading extravaganza. Read the Wherlocke series (If He's Wild, If He's Wicked and If He's Sinful--the last one was my favorite, a 5 star read!).

3.) Got one of my non-romance reading friends (let's call her "Jasmine" shall we? hee hee) addicted to romance novels. Her favorite so far is To Beguile A Beast by Elizabeth Hoyt. And we're just getting started with this new addiction....

4.) Twas The Night (holiday anthology) was a total dud. Ugh. Why can't I remember I don't like contemporary romance? Why, oh why?????

5.) The movie Morning Glory with Harrison Ford and Diane Keaton was absolutely adorable....I laughed my ass off. Totally recommend it!

6.) Check out this preview for Cowboys and Aliens. Harrison Ford and Daniel Craig together in a movie. Bad-ass-ness-orama! Oh yeah!!!!

7.) I have family coming from Cali, PA, New York, and RI for T-day. So, you won't be hearing from me for awhile...Gotta go shop for some turkey, clean the house, and of course the most important job...get to the liquor store!

Happy Thanksgiving Week to All,

Penny

Is Your Heart Trying To Tell You Something?

email title: This Is A Hot Flash?...sent to some friends on August 2, 2010

"Chest pain, head about to explode, heat and pain radiating down my arms, hands get numb, heat moves over my neck to my jaw, face turns red, dizziness, incredible heat/pressure/pain for 15 minutes until I think I'm gonna die. Holy Mother. I thought hot flashes meant you got sort of hot and sweaty for a couple of minutes. This SUCKS! I get a small one, then it goes away, then another one that's stronger, then it goes away, and they keep building up until I am totally incapacitated and lying on the floor."

One of my goals for the year is to spread the word about heart health. I'll be including healthy recipe ideas on my blog, and also information about recognizing the symptoms of heart failure, tips on reducing heart disease, etc. The message above is an actual email I sent to some friends in August of this year. I mistook my symptoms for early menopause. But it was NOT a hot flash. On August 3, 2010 I had a massive heart attack and was rushed to Beth Israel Hospital in Boston. I had been experiencing these symptoms for 2 weeks and brushed them off.

Unfortunately, many women experiencing chest pain do not realize what's happening to them. They attribute the pain to stress, indigestion, hormonal changes. Heart disease is the #1 killer of women in the U.S. But women are much more likely than men to put off seeing their doctor or to seek emergency treatment. Getting treatment quickly is absolutely critical!

Women's symptoms also vary greatly, which is another reason for misdiagnosis. Here is a list of possible symptoms...(from Women's Heart Foundation)

• pain, pressure, fullness, discomfort or squeezing in the center of the chest
• shortness of breath
• stabbing chest pain
• radiating pain to shoulders, neck, back, arm or jaw
• heart palpitations
• upper abdominal pain
• nausea, vomiting, severe indigestion
• sweating
• dizziness, weakness
• sudden extreme fatigue
• panic with feeling of impending doom

I had a hard time articulating my symptoms at first. But I knew something was terribly wrong. I just kept explaining it away.

If you, or any of your friends, family, or acquaintances are experiencing confusing symptoms, please follow up immediately with a doctor. (My doctor appointment was for August 4...I didn't quite make it!)

Women have a tendency to take care of everyone and everything else before themselves. And to ignore their own health. There are no more excuses for me. Taking care of my health comes first every day...taking my meds, going for walks, following a strict heart-healthy diet. I've lost 45 pounds, and my heart has already recovered. I feel incredibly fortunate and blessed.

I am so excited for Thanksgiving this year. All of my family will be here celebrating. I have a lot to be thankful for...great medical care in Boston, amazing support from family and friends, and a second chance. My Thanksgiving dinner will be a big-ass salad (with a little bit of turkey on top!). Nothing tastes as good as being alive!

Hoping for Good Heart Health for Everyone,

Penelope

Beard of the Day and Hannah Howell Reading Extravaganza!

Oh, boy! I just read my first Hannah Howell book, If He's Wild, and I am hooked, baby! It is part of a cool paranormal historical series called the Wherlocke series, about an extended family all with extraordinary "gifts"--detecting lies, reading minds, seeing ghosts, having visions, etc. etc. Although the book was a bit slow to start, once it picked up I was completely riveted. Howell has created a seriously bad-ass group of paranormal characters. (Oh yeah, the love story is really good, too...hee hee!). I already started If He's Wicked, and next up is If He's Sinful.

Since Hannah is well known for her Highlander series, I thought I would post a kilt-y beard of the day: Liam Neeson, looking rugged and fine in his plaid.

My husband and I are celebrating our 20th wedding anniversary this weekend (belatedly, since our first attempt was interrupted by my stupid heart attack!). We are headed to Vermont, my favorite place in all of the world. Quechee Antique Mall, here I come!

Happy, Happy Weekend!

Penelope

The Thing About Spanking....

Review of Second Chances by Carolyn Faulkner

Some things are meant to go together...

Peanut butter and chocolate.

Rodgers and Hammerstein.

Butch and Sundance.

Spanking and pregnancy...uh, not so much. Seriously. Not a good idea.

Second Chances (a contemporary, spanking erotica) has a laundry list of problems, not the least of which is ending a spanky erotica with a pregnancy. The funny thing is....despite all of these problems, I still really enjoyed the book.

First, let's start with the duds....

• copious grammatical errors--usually the kiss of death for me
• unlikable heroine...she's whiny and bratty, has a horrible self-image because of her size
• jarring POV changes; in general, not well-written
• after a fairly concise storyline, the author decides to throw in a dead baby, emotional meltdown (by hero), marriage proposal, marriage and pregnancy at the end of the book...all that was missing was the dead body in the library
• the spanking theme crossed the boundary (for me) from acceptable to uncomfortable

In spite of all of this, it also has a wonderful and romantic premise that I adore in romance novels. The heroine is a big girl, and the hero loves her, worships her, protects her, takes care of her, and lusts for her (and spanks the holy crap out of her, too...but let's not go there just yet). After reading Night Play by Sherrilyn Kenyon, I became a fan of "curvy girl" heroines....not all women are a size 2, and I like to see big girls get the guy for a change.

It's not really about the size. It's about the love. Regardless of the hero (or heroine's) flaws (too big, too small, war-injured, illegitimate, unfortunate tendency to turn into a werewolf when the moon is full, etc etc), I want the heroine (or hero) to fall madly, deeply in love, to see beyond the physical imperfections and find the true beauty of her (or his) soul-mate's being. This is a very, very romantic theme, and I personally love it.

Chance, the hero in this story, is a fabulous guy. He is patient and protective; he doesn't let Holly get away with belittling herself, he is sexy and domineering, and....did I mention patient? The freakin' guy waits ONE WHOLE FREAKIN' YEAR to be reunited with Holly after making a stupid mistake. He loves her just the way she is. He is a gem, and the perfect romance hero. (Well, except for the spanking thing....hee hee!).

Now....onto the spanking thing. I love a good fictional spanking as much as the next guy. In my mind, spanking is an extension of the alpha male exerting dominance over his woman...caveman-ish, but also sexy. One good swat on the fanny, then a lusty bout of love-making is always welcome. However, when the spanking crosses over into inflicting real pain....I have a problem with it.

This is my own personal opinion. I realize many folks are digging the whole BDSM thing right now, but in my mind, a true hero doesn't hurt his mate. I'm not really interested in diving into the whole psychological platform for this sort of behavior.

I just don't find hurting someone sexy. That's it. And I definitely think if an author is going to go that route in a book, then there shouldn't be any kids, pregnancies, etc etc. Call me crazy, but BDSM and carpools in the minivan seem like a strange partnership to me. I was about 75% okay with the spanking sitch in this book, but there was one scene that focused a lot on welts, pain, etc that made me cringe.

So, I have a lot of conflicted feelings about this book, but the bottom line (pun totally intended) is that I liked it. I'm giving it a B/B- grade (3.5 stars on goodreads). In spite of all of the problems, I loved the hero, and I loved how much he adores his big, beautiful soul-mate.

Grade: B/B-

Pondering the Prevalence of Paddles,

Penelope

Beard of the Day

Jake Gyllenhaal strikes me as a very wholesome guy. He is usually very well groomed, and even with a beard he looks like he's about 12 years old, a Boy Scout, and ready to help little old ladies cross the street. But Holy Moly, he sure looks different in the Prince Of Persia film. Wild, sexy, scruffy, and the bod isn't looking too shabby either. (For your viewing pleasure, see photo below....)

The word "beefcake" comes to mind, which is not a term I would normally associate with Jakey. Who knew?

Hope everyone has a great weekend. We continue with the "Year of the Bar Mitzvahs" and my son's first swim meet! Sweet!

Penelope

Reading Update: Red-Bearded Heroes, Blue-Faced Vikings and Mistletoe

Nothing brings me more hope, more excitement, more anticipation for a romance novel than....

....finding out the hero has a beard!!!! Hallelujah!

So, imagine my everlasting surprise and happiness when I discovered that the hero for Robyn Carr's A Virgin River Christmas has a beard. And not just any ol' beard, but a full-on, hard-core, lumber jack-style beard. And....it's red!

(Please take a moment of silence to process this wonderful ditty).

In spite of the fact that I don't love contemporary romance, I am loving this series. The characters are wonderful, the love stories incredibly satisfying, and the setting is rugged, natural, earthy....it's a great combination. This book was freaking fantastic! I didn't think Carr could create a better hero than Preacher, but I absolutely adore Ian! He roars like a wounded wild animal, and then gently, quietly feeds a deer from his hand. Swooning here, people. Swooning!

Ian and Marcie's story is perfectly done....their love unfolds slowly and believably as they bond in his tiny cabin. It is wonderful to see how Marcie helps to pull him out of his isolation and introduces him to the world again. Their love is healing, powerful and transforming. The scene at the end of the book when Ian sings in front of the memorial Christmas tree is astounding. One of the best scenes I've ever read. Robyn Carr is a true master of romance.

Grade: A+++++++ (can you tell I liked this one? hee hee.....)

Now, onto a totally different book, The Blue Viking by Sandra Hill. I needed some humor, so I turned to Sandra Hill. Well, I got the humor (Bolthor's poems continue to entertain), but I also got a touching love story. And a nice, lusty one, too. I am totally digging this author. She has an amazing way of blending humor, emotional depth of character, plot and conflict, and lusty loving. If I had a crystal ball, I would predict......more Vikings in my future. Oh yeah!

(My only beef with The Blue Viking was that it started out a little bit slowly. But I'm sure glad I stuck with it!).

Grade: A-/B+

Finally, a real Christmas treat. Linda Banche's Mistletoe Everywhere is an adorable, sweet and satisfying holiday story. I am not a big fan of "The Big Misunderstanding" in romance novels. However, this short story managed to keep me racing through the pages to find out how the hero and heroine would finally thwart the evil aunt's interference and rekindle their lost love. This story is well-written, whimsical and has a lovely and satisfying ending (although I wish their reconciliation had been a tad longer). And best of all, the heroine's name is....Penelope! This is the perfect holiday story....time for tree-trimming, eggnog and maybe a sprig of mistletoe or two!

Grade: A

Happy Reading To All,

Penelope