Sunday, December 13, 2015

Dear Amazon, I'm Pretty Sure That Sexy Bastards is NOT Women's Fiction

Dear Amazon,

I decided to treat myself to a new book this week. I was in the mood for women's fiction. I hopped right over to your Top 100 bestseller list, and guess what I found?

Sexy Bastards
Break Me: A Stepbrother Romance
Shawty Fell In Love With A Hustla
MMF Bisexual Romance Vacation for Three
Bad Boy Fire Bear Paranormal Bear Shifter Romance

I decided to try Romantic Comedy instead. There I found...

Monster Prick
Blindfold The Complete Box Set
Dirty Little Secrets
Stepbrother With Benefits
Call Me Killer A Bad Boy Romance

Obviously, it's me. I'm not using these lists correctly! So I decide to try one last favorite at this time of year. HOLIDAY ROMANCE! And I found these...

Stepbrother With Benefits Third Season
Bad Boy Daddy
Push Ultra Alpha MMA Badboy Mafia Romance
Steel Justice Romantic Suspense
Deliciously Mated

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm sure that some of these books might have something to do with Christmas romance. And possibly humor. And a woman's journey. But I have to admit that a lot of these titles sound like they're pretty-close-to-a-porno. I have no problem with that, per se. If you had a list of books called "pretty-close-to-a-porno" that would be great. But instead, I'm finding them in women's fiction.

What does that mean?

It means that the most important tool for browsing at Amazon--the bestseller list--is now worthless. The lists are filled with non-category books that don't belong there. And since Amazon has billions of books, it effectively destroys the only way that I can browse for books I like.

That's an epic fail for readers.

And from the other side of the coin--as an indie author--it's also an epic fail. One of the best ways I can reach readers is via the bestseller lists. But my Klaus Brothers Christmas romance cannot compete with MILFs and Stepbrothers and Badboys. So, I'm shit out of luck as an author, too.

Recently, I visited the bookstore in my hometown, and it was a lovely and pleasant experience. There were women's fiction books in the women's fiction section. There were comedies in the humor section. And there was a whole table of holiday fiction, and not one Stepbrother book in sight.

Dear Amazon,

You can do better.