Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Holiday Hair: A Post by Penny Reid

❅ A Special Holiday Post by PENNY REID


The Holidays are a very special time of year. If you’re anything like me (and, if you are, God help us all) you been waiting with bated breath for HOLIDAY HAIR!

Nothing says: Merry Christmas; Oh look, It’s Festivus; Happy Hanukkah; or have an adequate nondenominational wintertime gift giving season more than special hair do’s, don’ts, and darn it—why didn’t I think of that.

Since this is Penny Sr.’s blog, please bear with a few gratuitous, sexy man beards sprinkled within the merriment. [THANK YOU, PENNY JUNIOR!--Penny Sr.]

Top Holiday Hair

#1 Balls in the Hair. 
Or, as I would call out: Madame, did you know you have balls in your hair?

#2 Baby beards. 
This is epically cute. I’m not typically a fan of (other peoples’) babies, but if they all used this pacifier I might smile at them openly instead of whispering about their inability to control bowel movements behind their back.

#3 This guy. 
I don’t know why he looks so happy, but I want some of what he drank, ate, snorted, injected, or inhaled.

#4 Tree Hair.
 This is what I’m getting all my friends—a trip to the salon and green hair paint.

#5 I am one with the Holly. 
May she’s hunting, maybe she’s trying to become one with nature, maybe she’s your loony Aunt Ruth. I don’t care, her holiday hair is epic.

#6 I want this in my stocking. (I.e. gratuitous Bearded Merry Man Meat)

#7 Speaking of beards—how about giving the gift of a friendly suggestion?

#8 Candy Hair/Candy in your hair. 
If I did this I would have people (my kids, my husband, my husband’s creepy Uncle Herman and his new wife who I think is a stripper or a porn star) constantly trying to lick my hair. So… where do I sign up!!!?!

#9 Stache Cutters. 
If you can’t grow holiday facial hair, then eat it in cookie form.

#10 Snowed in: 
“Honey, you have something on your beard. No, not there—there. No, no—there’s still more. It’s, just on the left. Never mind! Go put your head in the oven!!”

Honorable Mention: Reindeer Hair Bun. 
Thank GOD Santa uses reindeer instead of a donkey (like Joseph and Mary). Then we’d be putting asses in our hair. Lord knows I need no more asses during Christmas.

What ever you’re celebrating (and part of me hopes it’s Festivus) I hope you have a relaxing, stress free, grievance airing with lots of good food, friends, and funny books. ;-)
Love, Penny (Jr.)

Thank you, Penny Reid, for this beard-heavy post. I approve! And I'm now off for my hair appointment to make my head look like a giant Christmas tree.

Happy Holidays and Festivus to the Rest of Us,
Penny Watson


Lisa Karafa said...

Loved this Penny!

Victoria Morgan said...

This is a riot! I was so wondering how to style my hair this Christmas. Who knew there were so many creative ideas to choose from? Candy, Christmas bulbs vs. antlers vs... Decisions, decisions.

Juju at Tales of said...

Ha! These are awesome. I like Holly girl!

Becky R said...

Oh goodness, I need that 'stache cutter and sugar cookies ever!

laura ruiz said...

#6. That's all.

Penelope said...

I like Holly Girl, too! (make sure you don't use poison ivy by mistake!)

Penny Reid said...

Thanks everyone for your comments ;-) This was so much fun. I found some great pictures- maybe not appropriate for the holidays- that I plan to use throughout the year...

Hair + sexy + yodel = interesting results.
<3 Penny (Jr.)

Brenda said...

My favorite is the hot guy. Does that make me easy to please, or difficult to please? :D

Geekamicus said...


Shirra said...

Love this! The guy! The hair! The cookie cutters!

Tasha Brandstatter said...

Is #6 Adam Levine?? If not it should be.

Nico Jaye said...

Hilarious!! Love it, Penny. :D Reindeer bun FTW!