Saturday, December 31, 2011

It's (Almost) A Brand New Year!


I started to write a blog post about my serious new year's resolutions. It was all heavy and profound....and totally laaaaaaaaaaame.

So instead, I decided to do this! Enjoy!

Penelope's 2012 New Year's Resolutions

1. Wear More Sparkly Nail Polish


A quick and efficient way to jazz up your day....I highly recommend it! (So does my 9 year old).


2. Make My Hair Bigger And Blonder


Some things never go out of style. (At least in my own mind).


3. Add To My Sequin Collection


If I'm going to be a glamorous romance novelist, I might as well look the part.


4. Collect Humiliating Sweaters For My Weenie Dog And Force Her To Wear Them


She'll thank me when she's older.


5. Watch More Hideously Bad Made-For-TV Movies On The SyFy Channel
(With Option To Turn Decapitation Events Into Drinking Game)


There's not a lot to do in suburbia on Saturday night. Believe me.


6. Leave No Stone (Or Log Cabin) Unturned Searching For The World's Greatest Beard


Too bad I can't get paid for this.....


7. Banish The Bunnies From My Garden


As God is my witness, I will have a pea crop this year! Bunnies Beware!


8. Work On A Top Secret Project (It May Involve Hugh Jackman, But My Lips Are Sealed....)


No amount of torture will force me to reveal this secret....although I am open to bribes.


9. Read More P*rn. Read More Spanky Elf Books. Read More.


Making easy-to-accomplish goals builds self-esteem.


10. Be Happy


Simple is always best.


To all of my readers.....

Have A Wonderful New Year!