Tuesday, November 8, 2011

In The Matter Of Full Disclosure....


Authors are getting "outed" and I figured this was just as good a time as any to come clean. It's not that I wanted to deceive my fans, but it was just part of my branding to be a slightly chubby, big-haired heterosexual white girl from Pittsburgh.

It's difficult to write romance and have folks take you seriously when you look like this....


Sigh. I know. It's not pretty. I'm actually a Bonaire Giant Sea Anemone. Condylactis gigantea. It's pretty embarrassing. I'm not cute and cuddly. I have stinging cells on the tips of my tentacles.

If I were writing sci fi or marine biology textbooks, this would make for perfect branding. But alas, it's not so great for romance. How do you hug someone with stinging tentacles? It's difficult....really difficult. Although not impossible. Just ask my husband. He's a super good sport about the whole thing.

Folks seem to forget that authors have this ultra amazing thing called....imagination. We don't have to be a man to write from a man's POV. We don't have to be gay to write a gay story. We don't have to be a vampire to write about sparkly blood-sucking guys. And most importantly, we don't have to be terrestrial vertebrates to write about them.

I hope you don't all hate me now. Don't come too close or I'll sting the crap out of you.

With the utmost sincerity.... (Seriously. I'm not kidding this time),
Penelope

13 comments:

Amber Skyze said...

OMG When I saw your picture I thought, she's so pretty. And on top of that you can tell you have a fun personality. :)

Penelope said...

Hi Amber! Sea anemones usually have a wicked sense of humor to make up for the stinging tentacles. Also, we like to encourage symbiotic relationships. :^)

sheryl kaleo said...

I had no idea you were so exotic. Love it!

Sheryl

Annette Blair said...

You're an original, Penelope Watson, that's for sure. I never would have guessed you were all those beautiful green/blue colors. And what's a little sting among friends? Hugs. Ouch.

Penelope said...

Hi Sheryl! I'm not as exotic as some cool types of anemones, like tube anemones, or zoanthids, but I guess I'm OK. Thanks. ;^)

Penelope said...

Hi Annette! I'm good at giving out stingers. But with love! Always with love! hee heeeee

Geekamicus said...

I'm good with you being an anemone. Had you been a sea cucumber, we would have to talk, but an anemone is good. Where'd you get your tentacles done, I like the color.

Penelope said...

Geek....sea cucumber! Pu-leeze! (Do you know Kevin the Sea Cucumber in Spongebob...that is one of the best episodes ever!). Not that I watch Spongebob a lot, or anything like that. I would never actually watch any of the episodes multiple times, like 40 or 50. Never.

Julia Rachel Barrett said...

A stinging rebuke! I love anemones and prickly starfish. So you rub me the right way. Wait, maybe I'm a clown fish so I'm accustomed to stings!
You can be as prickly as you want.

Steph from fangswandsandfairydust.com said...

I had to eat sea asparagus once. In Malyasia. That was no asparagus!
Very funny!

Penelope said...

Julia...If you're a clown fish, then we coexist in perfect harmony. Yay!

Penelope said...

Steph....Sea asparagus sounds good! I would probably love it!

Donna said...

Thank you for coming out. I know it was hard and I hope your readers and fellow writers support you. All the bashing that has gone on lately when readers find out who is behind the name is ridiculous. My little photo should give you a clue about my real identity. You can sting and I can get a bit prickly.

Donna