Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Penelope Ponders her Plethora of Pet Peeves



Cougar stories.

Cougars, in general.

Over-use of the words c**k and p***y in erotica. Come on people, get a thesaurus!

Over-abundance of ARC reviews. Release day is losing the magic.

Reading PDF files on my Kindle. My eyes! My eyes! Am I blind yet?

Authors who crank out 2000 words/day while I struggle with one freakin' scene. In a week.

When my expectations exceed reality for a new release.

Bunny poop in my front yard.

Bunnies taunting my wiener dog.

Run-away wiener dogs.

Unnecessary repetition in novels. You already told me the heroine is lusting for the hero. Seriously. Like a million times. Kick it down a notch, buddy.

People who take themselves too seriously.

Yellow pine pollen. Gallons and gallons of it everywhere. It's raining yellow baby powder, Mom!

Hijackers on the Amazon boards.

Apologies by high profile cheaters. Just once, I would like to see one of these no-account, skanky man-ho's skip the press conference, the trip to an "undisclosed facility for sex addiction," and media circus and say nothing. Absolutely nothing. Because honestly, there is nothing to say. You're a lyin', cheatin', skanky man-ho. The end.

Hot "trends" in romance. I'm waiting for the gay Amish vampire pirate book. Any day now.

Okay, I can't think of any others at the moment, but I'm thinking I need a big martini right about now! (hee hee...I'm not kidding!). Oh yeah, another pet peeve....restaurants that don't have a good martini menu!

If you have any irritating pet peeves you need to get off your chest, please feel free to leave a comment.


Penelope

16 comments:

Fiction Vixen said...

"gay Amish vampire pirate book" bwhahahahahahahahahah!!! :)

jacabur1 said...

I too have a problem with the pine pollen, thank goodness it is over where I live until next Spring so it is also one of my pet peeves.
My pet peeve right now is the heat, what happened to having an actual "Season" for more than one day? Summer is not supposed to have started but tell that to our Texas weather!!! It is blooming hot now since April where I live and getting hotter every day!!!


BTW the bunnies don't mean you harm, they are just looking for some daschund food!!
jackie b central texas

Patti said...

Sounds like you're having a rough day. Hope things get better soon! (And yes, I do share many of your peeves)

Penelope said...

Hey FV....for some unknown reason, I am actually having a hankering for a M/M Amish romance. Dear God help me!

Penelope said...

Hi jacabur1! The pine pollen is unbelievable here in Mass...you can actually see it in the air, big clouds of it floating in the sky. Yuck! I couldn't handle Texas heat. I can't even handle Mass. heat.

The bunnies call me Mrs. McGregor.

Penelope said...

Thanks, Patti. Nothing that a mango martini won't fix. And summer vacation!

Julie at Outlandish Dreaming said...

I feel your pain! Particularly the one about release day - how many times do I have to see the same Tessa Dare book reviewed and hyped at on my blog roll? I get it already - it's out! Kind of loses it's punch after the 5th review in one day.

Penelope said...

Hi Julie! I barely even read blurbs for new books...and I definitely don't want to read a review before release day and wreck the fun. I'd heard so much about Lover Mine before the book was even out that I lost interest when my copy arrived. I haven't even read it yet!

Juju at Tales of Whimsy.com said...

LOL
AMEN on C & P :)

Cougar stories are so ick

Penelope said...

Hi Juju! Yeah, the cougar thing skeeves me out, too.

Kate said...

Oh Rats! I was thinking of becoming a cougar. You know, just for fun. (tee hee. OK I know this is bad. Very,very bad of me. I'm in a mood.)

Well if my friends don't like cougars I guess I'm stuck being myself - which is my current pet peeve! I'm boring.

Penelope said...

Kate...you are so not boring! Now, if I lived up in the wilds of Vermont, I would personally be searching for a big, bearded mountain man to call my own. Big man, big beard, maybe a lumberjack? Who needs a younger, inexperienced skinny-ass guy when there are lumberjacks running around in the woods? Woo hoo!

Julia Rachel Barrett said...

Oh my god! I think you nailed it! Except for the pollen. I have no pollen problem or bunny problem. Don't hate me...I wrote a Cougar story as a self-challenge to see if I could actually pull a plot and decent characterizations together in 5000 words. The damn thing ended up getting published - but it's a good story, Cougar or not!
Laughing out loud - M/M/Amish/F/F/Vampire/Werepanther/WolfShifter/Unicorn....

Penelope said...

Julia! You wrote a cougar story! Ack! What's the age difference...I can handle it as long as it's not a 19 year old kid with a 45/50 year old woman. Please tell me it's not!!!!!!!!

Julia Rachel Barrett said...

Penny - 29 year old man - chef, with a 41 year old woman - nurse. Is that so bad? It's actually a sweet story - I took great pains to avoid an ick factor.

Penelope said...

Okay, that's not a horrible age difference. In fact, I wouldn't even call that a cougar story. I'm thinking 15-20 years age difference for a real cougar story. And, a guy who is almost 30 is not a young, inexperienced dude.

You're (almost) off the hook...hee hee hee!